The Impatient, But Happy Hooker

Question: Why should I Learn to Crochet?

Answer: So you can make bad ass, little demented projects you and your friends will squeal over!

New, Fun, Crochet finds!

This is TOTALLY NOT your grandma's crochet! check out these crocheted little gems:

http://www.wickedcrochet.blogspot.com/



Gotta love Croshame.com!

OK,  before I begin this post here's a fun game: Take a shot every time you see the word "crochet" in this post; I guarantee you'll be wasted at the end :D.

P.S: Take advantage of all the click-able links on this post, they will direct you to more fun tutorials, sites and videos!

Crocheting isn't as hard as I thought it was going to be! After watching the You Tube videos in my first crochet tutorial blog post, I started crocheting and before I knew it I made a scarf! I was so proud of myself...until I received my book The Happy Hooker in the mail :/ Apparently, there are several versions of a "Single Crochet" stitch. The tutorial I found had me crocheting under one of the loops on the V on the chain stitch instead of both, the Author, Debbie Stoller, called this "Lazy Crochet":( since it leaves "unsightly holes" in your pattern. Unsightly?! I thought it made a pretty pattern; that is until I saw what her single crochet stitches looked like. The other way some people do the single crochet stitch is through the "butt" of the chain stitch; like the lady in this YouTube video, she obviously likes it in the butt...So after reading the first three chapters of The Happy Hooker and learning about the different types of yarn, different types and sizes of crochet hooks, and the Single Stitch Crochet, I began to make rows and rows of  Single Crochet until I could almost do it with my eyes closed. I made a 6x6"square and compared it to my Lazy Scarf and I have to side with her on this one; doing Single Crochet the proper way makes all the difference! So for this lesson, I will go over all the important info leading up to learning the single crochet.

The Lazy Stitch                                         Single Crochet Stitch                                 Half Double Crochet Stitch

Choosing yarn.

I had no idea there were so many different types of yarn. I assumed they were all the same, but different colored. Basically, there are four types: Plant based (cotton, hemp), Animal based (angora, wool, cashmere), Plastic (Acrylic, Rayon), and Blends. The plastic kind is the cheapest, but you definitely get what you pay for in most cases. As I found out with my Lazy Scarf, it can make a pretty scratchy and yucky feeling texture against your skin. So if grandma has ever made you a scratchy blanket, you can assume she was being a cheapskate or perhaps secretly punishing you for not visiting as much as you should. Either way, now you are on to her! So, to keep from going insane when turning the corner of your local craft store and freaking out over the wall of rainbow yarn rolls that kind of bleeds into a single organism, just grab a roll of yarn, check the label, and find out what type it is, or just pick one that feels good against your skin. I recommend learning with Acrylic, since it's the cheapest, but once you get the basics you may want to step it up to blends or even 100% cotton.

There are also different thicknesses to take into consideration, so just remember the thicker your yarn, the thicker your crochet hook must be. The thinnest yarn available is called Fingering weight yarn. It's 4 ply (4 strands of thread,twisted into a single strand) and is best for making lightweight sweaters or baby stuff. Going up the ladder is Sport Weight yarn, which is double the thickness of Fingering, Worsted Weight which is twice as thick as the Sport Weight, Chunky weight (Yes, even yarn must be politically correct now-a-days) twice the size of Worsted, and Extra-Bulky Weight which is really hefty.

Choose your weapon. 

The crochet hook/needle determines how tight your stitches are, the bigger the needle, the looser your stitches. I started out  with a medium size, or 4 mm size G6 in "crochet speak." This was a little difficult for a beginner because the tighter your stitches, the harder it is to wedge your uncoordinated needle-yielding hand into the correct stitch. So just keep going up in size if you keep making jelly beans and can't figure out why. Jelly bean shapes occur because you are keeping too much tension in your yarn while crocheting...trust me...I made a lot of jelly beans! My favorite hook to use, when using size Fingering (4 ply) weight yarn is the 6 mm, size J10. That one seems to be the perfect size for my little hobbit fingers. The evil Lucy Fur also approves of this hook...

Get situated.

The beauty of crocheting is that you can fit it in to any tight schedule, I always multitask and crochet while watching Dexter as I wind down for the night. It can be a little difficult to keep consistent tension when trying to crochet directly from the roll of yarn, so make a ball out of it. To make a ball, place the end of the yarn in the palm of your hand and begin winding the yarn in a figure-eight pattern around your thumb and pinky. Once you do this about 20  times, pull the two loops off your fingers and fold them on top of each other. Begin winding the rest of your yarn around and around until all the yarn is on the ball. This is much better than having to wind it off of the lop-sided roll the entire time. So, now that you have your yarn ball and your favorite crochet hook, find a cozy spot on the couch  or computer and start doing your single crochet whether you prefer the "Lazy Crochet," the double V crochet, or the "like it in the butt" crochet. To each his(or her!) own.

Happy Hooking!

Update: Here is another helpful blog that will help you master crochet "Art Of Crochet by Teresa"